love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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