I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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