May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
