Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
