She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
we're making bets on your personal life
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
