Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
