Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
