My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
