Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
