if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
