If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize