I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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