pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Duck Duck Cougar?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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