How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
