She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
