Where is the hickey?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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