I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Randomize
