Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Randomize
