What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize