I didn't shave. On purpose
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
