Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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