We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize