I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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