it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
