dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
