just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Randomize