And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
