ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize