You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
