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good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
there is glitter all over my balls
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