Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
