im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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