at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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