woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize