Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
