I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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