whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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