Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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