i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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