You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize