Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
