Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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