Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
