im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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