I think scott just propositioned me for sex
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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