office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
