im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize