from now on my penis is your penis
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
