i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
