In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Quick, to the slutcave!
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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